Rare Beneath

I have always believed that I have a willing ear and a sympathetic heart in the person of Lion (not his true name), but I discovered to my chagrin that it was an unrealistic expectation.  How could such as he possibly understand that even people like us can have problems, when the ones he has faced are much greater and much deeper than ours? 

Yet it is also possible that I am committing the same mistake by thinking this of him.

He doesn’t yet know the extent of my strength so he gives me advice that I do not need. He probably believes I am some sort of weakling… but I would understand his supposition. He is after all almost a stranger to me and I to him.

And he doesn’t understand that I merely needed to tell someone what is in my heart, to hear my own voice and discover my own solution by doing so.  I simply needed to spell it out and be able to look at the situation from a distant point of view and thus find just where something went wrong.  But no, he had to go and start telling me what I should do and how I should react, never even trying to understand why I wanted to talk to him, when it was clear that I didn’t even need his help.  I just needed him to listen.

So where does that leave us? Nowhere as always.

Oh babe.  Just hear me out please. I don’t need your advice. I’m strong enough by myself. I haven’t needed anyone for years, I sure don’t need to do that now. I just wanted you to know. I just wanted you to listen.  But you were wrong if you ever thought that I am weaker than you.  I don’t know you and you don’t know me, so please don’t judge me by the little that you do know.  Don’t put me in a box and mark it yellow, my blood is red, my heart still beats. And my mind… my mind is too wild, too colorful to be contained.